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The Abb? Mauduit sat two on his knees, passing his long arms dressed in black behind the neck of children and about their heads with a paternal movement, I kissed his forehead with a very tender kiss.
Then put them back on the floor, and small creatures, the child in front and behind the girls, they left.
-I love children, Father, ‘said the Countess.
-Much, sir.
The old lady raised her blue eyes toward the priest.
And … your loneliness, you never I weighed too much?
-Yes, sometimes.
He paused, hesitated, then continued:
‘But I was not born to worldly life.
– What do you know that?
– Oh! I know quite well. I was created to be a priest, I have followed my path.
The countess watched him continuously:
‘Let’s see, Father, tell me, tell me, as I have decided to give up everything that makes us love life, everything that comforts us and sustains us?. Who has pushed or led you from the very natural way, marriage and family? You are not nor an exalted, not a fanatic, or a grim, no sad. Was it an event, a penalty, which I’ve decided to pronounce vows for life?
The Abb? Mauduit rose and approached the fire, after the flames spread to their village priest’s shoes. Always seemed hesitant to answer.
It was a huge white-haired old man was serving twenty years in the community of Saint-Antoine-du-Rocher. The peasants said of him:
‘It’s a good man.
It was indeed a great man, condescending, family, kind and above all, generous. Like St. Martin, he had his coat torn in two. It was easy laugh and also cry little, as a woman, which hurt him even a little rude to the character of the peasants.
The old Comtesse de Saville, retired in his castle of Rocher to care for their grandchildren after the successive deaths of his son and his wife, he loved his priest, and said of him: “It’s a charm.”
He came every Thursday to spend the night with the owner of the castle and had created between them a good and honest friendship among the elderly.
They understood almost half words, with the two good people, with the goodness of ordinary people and tender.
She insisted:
-Come, priest, confess you.
The repeated:
-I was not born for the common life. I realized a long, happy and very often I found that I was wrong.
My parents, haberdashers in Verdiers vendors, and very rich, had high hopes for me. They sent a very young age pension. No one knows what may come to have a child in a school for the mere fact of separation, isolation. This uniform and tender life is good for some, abhorrent to others. The small things are often the heart much more sensitive than you thought, and locking them too soon, far from those they love, can develop a sensitivity to excess that exalts, that becomes unhealthy and dangerous.
I just did not play, I had no companions, spent my time missing the house, crying at night in my bed, I broke the head to regain memories of my home, memories insignificant little things, little events. I constantly thought all I had left there. I turned slowly in an exalted for whom the slightest annoyances were terrible penalties.
With all this I remained silent, closed in myself, without expansion, without confidants. This work was done soberly mental excitement and thoroughly. The nerves of children are quickly shaken, we should keep an eye on those who live in profound peace, to almost complete its development. But who can think for some college, an unjust punishment can be a pain so great as it will later be the death of a friend? Who exactly is aware that some young souls suffer for a trifle terrible emotions, and are quickly sick souls, incurable?
This was my case. This faculty of regret developed in me so that my whole existence became a martyrdom.
I did not say, said nothing, but gradually I became a sensation, or rather, a sensitivity so vivid that my soul seemed an open wound. All that playing made her pangs of pain, vibration and consequently appalling havoc. ! Happy men that nature has armed battleship stoic indifference!
I arrived at 16 years. An excessive timidity characterized me as a result of this capacity to suffer with it. Feeling naked before all the attacks of chance or fate, feared all contacts, all approaches, all the events. He lived on alert and under the constant threat of an unknown and always expected misfortune. I dared not even speak, or act in public. He felt that life was a battle, a terrible fight where blows are tremendous, painful wounds fatal. Instead of feeding, like all men, the blessed hope of the day later, only a confused fear and kept me feeling like a sort of hide, to avoid this fight in which I would be beaten and killed.
Topped my studies, I had six months of holidays to choose a career. A very simple event suddenly made me see things clearly, showed me the sickly state of my spirit, made me realize the danger and made me decide to escape.
Verdiers is a small town surrounded by plains and forests. The main street was the house of my parents. Recently, I spent my days away from this house which I had missed so much, had so desired. They had awakened in my dreams, and I walked through the fields, all alone, to let them escape, fly away.
My father and mother, busy with their trade and concerned about my future, I spoke only of their sales or my potential projects. I wanted as a positive, practical spirit, I wanted to reason with his heart before. I lived walled in my thoughts and my eternal trembling with anxiety.
Now, one evening after a long journey, I noticed, when striding back not to be late, a dog running towards me. It was kind of red spaniel, very thin, with long curly ears.
When he was stopped ten paces. And I did the same. Then he began to shake his tail and came over to baby steps, moving from fear of his whole body, bending over their feet to implore and gently moving the head. I called. He made as if downgraded, looking so humble, so sad, pleading that I felt tears in his eyes. I went to him, it was after I turned and knelt showing tenderness to attract. Put an end, was within reach of my hand and very gently, I caressed him with infinite precautions.
Then he brightened, rose slowly placed his paws on my shoulders and began to lick my face. I went to the house.
It was really the first being that I loved passionately, because he returned my affection. My affection for this animal was, in fact, exaggerated and ridiculous. I thought, confusingly, that we were two brothers, lost on earth so isolated and helpless as the other one. He does not let me ever slept at the foot of my bed, ate at the table despite the displeasure of my parents and me in my travels was lonely.
I often stopped on the edge of a ditch and sat on the grass. Sam then went, slept next to me or on my knees and lifted my hand to the tip of the nose to be stroked.
One day in late June, while on the road to Saint-Pierre-de-Chabrol, I come from Ravereau diligence. Approaching at a gallop, drawn by four horses, with its trunk and hood yellow black leather covering his empire. The driver was flicking his whip, a cloud of dust rose under the wheels of heavy carriage and then waved from behind a cloud.
And suddenly, as it was approaching me, Sam, perhaps frightened by the noise and wanting to join me, was launched in front of her. The leg of a horse knocked him down. I saw it roll, turn, back up, fall back on all feet. After the coach gave two jolts whole and saw behind it, in dust, something stirred on the road. He was almost cut in two, all hung inside his belly torn, blood bubbling out. He tried to stand, walk, but only the two front legs could move and scratch the earth to make a hole. The other two were already dead. Howled dreadfully, mad with grief
He died within minutes. I can not express what I felt and what I suffered. I was in bed for a month.
But one evening my father to see me angry in this state for so little, he cried:
– What happens when you have real pain, if you lose your wife, your children! Look, you fool!
These words, since then, remained in my head, tormented me: “May be then, when you have real pain, if you lose your wife, your children!”
And I began to see clearly at me. Realized because all the small miseries of each day taking my eyes catastrophic importance. I realized that I was made to suffer intensely for all to perceive all the painful impressions, multiplied by my diseased sensibility, and an atrocious fear of life overwhelmed me.
I had no passion, no ambition, I decided to sacrifice the happiness possible to avoid the pains accurate. Existence is short, I go to the service of others, alleviating their pains and enjoy their happiness, I told myself. Not directly experiencing neither one nor the other would not receive more than the weak emotions.
And yet, if you knew how misery tortures me, destroys me! But what would have been for me an intolerable suffering, became sympathy and pity.
These penalties each time I play, I would not have endured falling on my own heart. Death could not have seen one of my children without dying myself. And yet, I have been so afraid, dark and penetrating, to events, that the sight of the postman in my house each day passed me a chill through the veins, and yet now I have nothing to fear.
The abbot paused Maudit. I looked at the big fire in the fireplace, as if he saw there mysterious things, all the unknown of existence could have lived if he had been bolder in front of the suffering. He added with a lower voice:
‘I was right. Was not for this world.
The Countess said nothing at last, after a long silence she said:
-I, if I had my grandchildren, I no longer have the courage to live.
And the priest got up without saying a word.
As the servants slept in the kitchen, she took him to the door leading onto the garden and sink into the night saw its enormous shadow slowly illuminating a reflection of light.

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The Cast. Here we go with the big one. The first film has one of the stinkiest casts ever assembled. Willem Dafoe as the Green Goblin is truly awful, and not in a good way. If I didn’t know what film I was watching I would assume it was a send up of how to play a super villain. The Green Goblin suit didn’t help matters but the performance is so over the top it just can’t be taken seriously and therefore ruins my enjoyment of the movie.

Then there’s the main character Tobey Macguire who plays Tobey Macguire in a Spiderman suit. I find his acting style to be virtually non existent. He has one look and that is to look a bit ‘woe is me’. Spiderman in the comics was a fun loving guy who needs to juggle his super hero antics with his busy life. There’s no need for angst in a Spiderman movie. There’s a reason he got the nickname Spidey. He’s a likable character.

That said. The tone of the films doesn’t set the story in a realistic grounded setting. I think the films are set in some kind of weird limbo where people don’t act the way they do in everyday life. Of course the idea of a Spiderman is pretty far fetched but what’s interesting to me is always to see how a fantastical story affects real world environments and relationships. Maybe the next films will have more of a serious tone. And if I know gritty reboots they probably will.